


Remember Me

by ncdover1285



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Amnesia, Anal Sex, M/M, Minor Character Death, Protective Lucifer, Wing Kink, Wing Oil As Lube, grace for prep, stuck in the cage, the devil isn't so bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-25 20:10:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21361993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ncdover1285/pseuds/ncdover1285
Summary: When Sam is literally yanked from the cage he fights the hands on him. He later fights his mind as the memories try to force themselves through. When his wall comes down his body shuts down under the amount of memories that flood in. What he sees couldn’t be real could it? Might Lucifer really not be that bad?
Relationships: Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Mentioned Castiel / Dean Winchester
Comments: 7
Kudos: 98





	Remember Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fic for the Samifer Big Bang. I chose to go with a mini bang though. I hope that you all enjoy it.  
I want to thank Tami and Bobbie for being amazing betas, and sirlsplayland for the art linked below.  
https://www.artstation.com/artwork/XB81ED  
Comments and Kudos are love, leave me some :)

Part One: The Cage

“I thought this was supposed to be torture?” Sam says as he lays down next to Lucifer in their bed.

“It has been. I was alone for millennia, and that pocket dimension that Michael is stuck in kept me lost for centuries.” He carded his hand through Sam’s hair as he finished that confession. Lucifer wanted to distract his lover, he didn’t want to dwell on the very real torture that the cage could cause. Sam responded beautifully, just like always. Lucifer tugging on Sam’s hair was a sure fire way to get his engine running every time, and the discussion was dropped again. He hoped that he could keep Michael away from Sam forever, but the pocket dimensions could be broken. He only hoped that Michael would be content playing with his own vessel for now.

When they had fallen into the cage Lucifer and Michael had been extracted from their vessels. Lucifer had been worried about Sam, even if he was pissed at him, so he took on the form of his previous host, Nick. Michael, however, had no issue with showing his true form, so he had sent his brother to one of the more difficult pocket dimensions along with Adam. He really did hope that Adam would be alright, he knew that Sam would be upset if he wasn’t, but he still had to protect Sam first and foremost.

So, Sam spent most of his time either banging the devil or getting banged by him. Dean would be so disappointed. It didn’t matter anymore though, because after years of waiting, Sam had given up on Dean finding a way to get him out. He was sure that Dean had tried, there were just some things that even a Winchester couldn’t accomplish, and he didn’t blame his brother for that.

Sam had learned a lot about Lucifer since their fall, mostly that he wasn’t what everyone had made him out to be. He had tried to explain this to Sam once before, but here Lucifer really didn’t have a reason to lie to Sam, even if he thought about doing so. He was lonely and misunderstood, his brother had locked him in a cage because he refused to bow down to humans. So what? The other angels treated people like playthings that were below them. How was that any different than Lucifer changing one into a demon to show his brother and father that they weren’t infallible? Sam had definitely gained a new perspective on all things Lucifer related, and he knew that it wasn’t only him. They really were more alike than Sam had wanted to admit when he had been topside.

Sam and Lucifer had been laying in bed after their latest round and dare he even think it, cuddling. Who would have thought that the devil was a cuddler?  
“What has you grinning?” Lucifer had evidently been watching him again.  
“You, I never would have thought this would be my reality.” Sam chuckled and wrapped his arm a little tighter around the archangel’s shoulders.

“I tried to show you how it could be, granted at the time I was trying to get inside you in a completely different way, but even with that, if you hadn’t fought so hard we could have had this in your mind.” This was an old argument that no longer carried any heat with it. Sam thought that maybe they only had it out of habit at this point.

There was a sound like thunder, and the whole cage started shaking as if there was an earthquake. Sam had only the time to question if they could possibly feel earthquakes here before there was a sharp tugging sensation. Lucifer looked scared, and that was enough reason for Sam to want to fight whatever this was. Reaching for the archangel that he has himself fallen for in their time here, Sam feels the tugging change into a ripping sensation, while Lucifer is yelling and wrapping his wings around Sam. Then, everything went black.

Part Two: Topside

The first thing that Sam notices as he comes to is that there are more hands on him than should be possible. He jerks away, thinking that maybe Michael had broken out of the pocket dimension. “Sam?” Dean’s voice causes Sam to open his eyes. The brightness when he does so makes him squint at the room around him, taking in the faces that are surrounding him in concern, but still not seeing the one that he wants the most. He starts fighting the hands, he has to see him, has to find him. Then it all goes black again.

“Sam, hey Sammy, come on open up those eyes for me.” Sam awakens to his brother’s voice.

Sam remembers the cemetery and being possessed by Lucifer. He remembers finally being able to take control of his body back, and throwing himself and Adam into the cage, along with two archangels that were sure to be pissed about him ruining their plan. What he doesn’t remember is what happened when they got there, or how he got back. “How?” His voice cracks a little as he asks his brother to explain what he can’t remember.

Dean explains about Death pulling his body from the cage, but having to go back for his soul once they had figured out that it had been left behind. He explains how Sam had freaked out when it had been restored, and how it was probably because of the torture from the archangels once his body was removed. “So don’t go picking any locks in there, okay Sammy?” Dean had tried to sound as if he was joking, but he was too worried about his brother to completely pull it off.

Sam, Dean and Cas went back to hunting and dealing with heaven and hell’s inability to control themselves, but Sam would feel a tug on his subconscious every now and then. This usually happened whenever he would think about Lucifer, and that only ever happened when he was alone. He never let his missing memories take over his thoughts when he was around Dean or Cas. Cas because, even though he promised not to read his mind, Sam couldn’t be sure. Dean was a different story.

Sam had asked Dean about it a few times, and Dean would always cut him short. “I wish I couldn’t remember hell, be glad he was able to do that for you.”  
Sam continued to feel as if something was missing though, he just couldn’t put his finger on it. Sometimes when Sam would wake up, he would be confused about where he was. He would dream about the cage and Lucifer, but they couldn’t be his lost memories, because they weren’t nightmares. Well, some would consider them as such, but he would always wake up feeling sad not scared. He never could figure out why, until Castiel broke the wall, and his heart.

He was losing his mind. His memories had come back, but that only made things worse. The first thing was pain, as all the years that he had spent in hell had given him so many memories, and they were all flooding into him at once. Then came the confusion, there was Lucifer, but he wasn’t his Lucifer. He would always be able to tell the difference now between the real Lucifer and the one that his mind conjured up. His Lucifer had never said the kinds of things that the hallucination was saying to him, he had never been so full of disdain towards Sam. No, this wasn’t Lucifer, it was Sam’s hatred for himself, his guilt for leaving his Lucifer behind to suffer alone in the cage. Then came pain again, not in his head this time, but in his heart. He missed his archangel. Time passed, but Sam couldn’t get out of his head to realize it. Then it came to a stop, as Cas took his memories and his madness upon himself.

Cas’s vessel pretty much shut down as soon as this happened. He was trapped in the never ending spiral that was Sam’s mind. Sam worried for the angel that had become his friend, but he couldn’t escape the worry for something else. He wasn’t sure what it was at the moment, but he knew there was something in his memories that he didn’t want anyone to see, something that would make him vulnerable. He just couldn’t remember it, again. “Come on Sam, he can handle it.” Dean’s gruff voice brought him out of his thoughts and he followed him out of the hospital.

Part Three: Dreams

Sam was being pinned to the bed by something that he couldn’t see, but he wasn’t afraid. This felt like something that he had done hundreds of times, but being a hunter made you leary of being tied down, so his instincts should be screaming at him right now. They weren’t, it was his erection that held his attention at the moment, until he noticed someone coming closer to him from out of the shadow. The man was tall and thin, but built. Sam gasped as Lucifer in Nick’s body made his way to the bed. He ran the tip of one of his giant wings up the inside of Sam’s leg. The wing continued it’s path up and over Sam’s aching cock that twitched as the feathers ghosted over it.

“Hm, always knew you had a thing for my wings Sammy.” Sam shook as the wing continued up his body, finally lifting away after trailing up to his fingers. Lucifer climbed over Sam’s waist, reaching back to line himself up with Sam’s erection he finally looked at his face.

“Glad I still have my grace, or this would just take too long, instant prep work.”

Then he sank down, causing Sam to moan out an almost embarrassing sound. Once the archangel had started up the rhythm, he released his hold on Sam’s arms, allowing him to reach under Lucifer’s arms and fondle the wings. He rubbed over the bare back of the man Lucifer was portraying, until he was able to get enough leverage to reach up where the wings joined skin. Plunging his fingers into the fine feathers at the base of his wings made Lucifer flex around Sam’s cock, and his own jerked with interest. There was an oily substance running down Sam’s arms, and he used it to slick up Lucifer’s dick. Using a tight grip and swift tugs, Sam brought the archangel to orgasm. The feeling of Lucifer’s release on his chest, and the tightness that came with his partner's orgasm, brought Sam to his own. Coming down from the sex induced high, Lucifer laid down next to Sam and snapped his fingers, cleaning up any sign of what they had just been doing. This also placed his wings into another plane of existence, so they were not in his way as he snuggled up to Sam.

“Are all angels as snugly as you after sex?” Lucifer laughed, but he went serious after just a few seconds.

He leaned over and pressed an almost sweet kiss to Sam’s lips. “Well, father made us social creatures, and I have been alone for a very long time.” His tone caused Sam to want to snuggle him right back, and possibly never let his angel go.

Sam startled looking around the room, but Lucifer was gone, and so was the lavish bedroom he had just been in. He was back in the motel room that he shared with his brother. Dean looked at him from the other bed, but Sam simply relied, “dream” and turned to face the wall, away from his brother’s concerned expression. He couldn’t deal with having to explain that dream to his brother, especially when the feelings attached to it hadn’t left when he awoke. Sam was starting to believe that these dreams weren’t just dreams, but memories. He was confused by this, because his brother had lead him to believe that he had been tortured during his time in the cage, but that wasn’t torture.

When the brothers awoke a few hours later, Sam couldn’t remember the dream that had woken them both in the middle of the night. This made him even more confused and Dean didn’t believe it for a second. The only thing that Sam remembered was feeling almost heartbroken with no idea why. This had been going on for a few weeks, ever since they had left the hospital, and Sam thought that he needed to go pay Castiel a visit. It was hard to convince his brother that this was something that he should do alone. Dean still remembered his time in hell, and didn’t want Sam to be dealing with it on his own, especially if his memories were returned once again. Sam didn’t get the feeling that Dean would like whatever Cas told him, he wasn’t really sure if he would, but he felt like it was something he needed to know. So two weeks after the dream that caused him to wake Dean up, he left to visit Cas on his own.

Cas sat there facing out the window, when Sam entered the room he turned to face the hunter with a sigh. “Sam, I had a feeling that you could come. These memories are much too strong to be kept from you completely once you had experienced them without the wall. I’m surprised Death was actually able to keep them locked in before. I am sorry about that by the way.” Cas glanced to the corner of the room, seeing something that Sam was unable to, even though he felt that he could probably guess what or better yet who Cas was seeing. “I think the memories are coming back through my dreams. Every night I dream of the cage, of different things that happened while I was there. I’m not sure how they could be memories, but the feelings that are attached to them linger almost like they are something I should be feeling.” Cas looked up at Sam and Sam knew that he was seeing his memories, the resigned set to the angel’s face told him more than his words ever would.

“Yes Sam, that would make sense with the memories I currently have. Tell me, you weren’t fighting anyone when you first woke up were you?” Sam shook his head, “I don’t remember all of that time, like I said I’m mainly seeing what happened in the cage. If it’s any indication then I probably wasn’t, I believe that I was looking for someone.” Cas had begun nodding along with Sam, “I figured, you were looking for Lucifer. He was not one to torture you in the cage was he Sam?” Sam looked down at his shoes as a memory came to him. “I thought this was supposed to be torture?” “It has been. I was alone for millennia…” Sam gasped looking back up at Cas, “and I left him alone again.” Sam and Cas seemed to come to the same conclusion, that Sam would be able to withstand his memories now that he knew what they contained. Once Sam had his memories and Cas was able to leave the hospital they left, there was a very serious talk that Sam needed to have with his brother.

Part Four: Lucifer

Lucifer tried to follow Sam when his body was pulled from the cage. He had his hunter’s soul wrapped tightly in his wings protected by his grace. The glowing light pulsed and shook, it wasn’t safe for a human soul to be exposed like this. Michael could come at any time and the damage would be greater without the body to protect it. As hard as he tried though he was unable to get out of the small exit before it has closed again. He yelled at whoever was out there, but they ignored him like always. He hoped he would be able to keep Sam’s soul safe, he just didn’t know how long he would be able to. Taking the bright soul to a corner of his constructed pocket dimension that held their bedroom Lucifer talked to it as if he was talking to Sam, because in a way he was. The flashes and shaking seemed to slow and he was able to calm the hunter’s soul down, it was as if it was curling up to him seeking comfort. Perhaps it was. The time in the cage is inconsistent at best and Lucifer had no idea how long he had spent huddled in the corner protecting the soul, but after what seemed like ages there was a sharp flash and it was pulled from his grasp. Lucifer knew that it wasn’t Michael who had taken it, so he had to believe that whoever had taken Sam’s body had come back for it. When Sam was completely taken from him Lucifer had no other reason to move around so he closed in on himself. Surely Sam wouldn’t leave him in here. He could wait until his lover found a way to save him. He knew that Sam loved him, after all they had spent over a century together in hell time and Sam had told him that if his brother managed to get him out then he would come back for Lucifer. The archangel just had to have a little faith in the human who had stolen his heart.

Part Five: Sam

“Dean, you don’t understand. What I’m trying to tell you is that he didn’t torture me, in hell or out. He saved me. When we dropped into the cage he was upset, but he threw his brother and ours into another pocket dimension to keep him from blinding me, he took on a different form for the same reason, he kept me safe from Michael. We really got to know each other while I was there and he isn’t what you think he is. The issues with the apocalypse was always Michael’s idea. Lucifer never had a chance to get him to stop because Michael thought he was following God’s plan and he is forever and always daddy’s little soldier. Lucifer wasn’t trying to cause problems he just wanted his family back. The same family that had locked him away for an eternity and the family that he still loved. He’s really not what you think he is and I guess neither am I, because while he was busy falling for the lowly mud monkey I was busy falling for him as well.” Dean stood up, looked at his brother and then at Cas, who had been standing in the corner letting Sam have his chance to talk. “I need a drink. I’ll be back.” Dean left the motel room and appeared to be heading to the bar across the street.

“Cas I can’t leave him down there. With Michael in the cage Lucifer wouldn’t have to fight him and he doesn’t want heaven. He doesn’t want to rule anything, he just wants to be left alone. I promised him that I would come back for him. It’s been over a year our time that’s a hell of a lot longer in the cage. He had to think that I abandoned him, and I haven’t I just didn’t realized that I needed to save him this time until my memories were returned. Please go talk to Dean, he just doesn’t understand and I know that you do. I mean you had the memories and the feelings that accompanied them, you know I’m telling the truth.” Cas crossed the room towards the door before looking back to Sam who was sitting at the little table he had sat at to talk to his brother so they could be face to face. “I will try Sam, but you know how your brother can be. If he believes that this would be putting you in danger he will be very difficult to talk into it, and I’m fairly certain that he considers Lucifer ‘shacking up’ with his baby brother to be dangerous.” Sam simply shook his head at the air quotes that Cas had used as the angel went to follow Dean across to the bar.

The more that Sam thought about it the worse that he felt. He knew that things hadn’t been as bad as Dean thought they were while he was in hell, but now that he had his memories the guilt was hitting him like a ton of bricks. He really had fallen for his archangel while he had been in the cage. He also knew that it would have been devastating for Lucifer when Sam was ripped out of his arms not only his body but then again when they had recovered his soul. Lucifer’s biggest fear was being trapped in the cage all alone again, but Sam hoped that it wouldn't have driven him to release Michael from his trap. That was the part that Sam left out when talking to Dean. If Michael had been released then when he went in to get Lucifer then he would also risk letting Michael free to roam the Earth once again. Sam was going to need help with this. He pulled out his phone scrolling through the contacts, when the phone was answered the voice on the other end of the line seemed surprised to hear from him and he really couldn’t blame them.

Dean and Cas made their way back from the bar to find Sam on the phone. He held a finger up for them to wait just a minute as he finished his call. “Alright Crowley, I just need to make sure that Lucifer is the only one that can get to your little box. Dean and Cas are back, let me know when you have it ready.” Sam turned to look at his brother who had a very concerned look on his face. “You’re working with Crowley now?” Sam shook his head in the negative. “He owed us a favor, I’m simply calling it in. He isn’t really happy about it, but a deal is a deal. You guys have a nice talk?” “A deal is a deal? Damn Sammy, you really have been taking lessons from the devil.” When there was no response the Dean just looked at Sam for several seconds, letting the quiet drag to uncomfortable lengths before starting in with his thoughts.

“Look I get it, I really do, but how do I know for sure that things won’t go back to how they were before. I mean, we really weren’t trying to put Michael in the cage were we? Just because the sex was good,” this part was said while casting an unidentifiable look at Cas that Sam assumed was because of him sharing the memories with Dean as a way to persuade him, “doesn’t mean that he won’t come out all evil. I mean he’s the devil Sammy.” The use of the nickname made Sam happy, if his brother could use it then things were looking good and he wasn’t as concerned as he was letting on. I mean, he has to try to dissuade Sam, that’s his job. “We have archangel cuffs now, something that we didn’t have before and the sigils that we found specifically for containing Lucifer. With these things we can easily trap him back if he becomes a problem. I’m just asking for a chance. What if it was Cas wouldn’t you want to get him out?” With that Sam looked to Cas with an ‘I’m sorry’ look, Sam knew that it made both his brother and the angel uncomfortable to think about whatever was going on between them, let alone talk about it, but Sam needed the connection, because he knows that his stubborn brother is in love with Cas, has been pretty much all along, they just don’t ever mention it.

“Sam, really? What does Crowley have to do with all this?” Dean had a pouty expression that quickly turned into curious, they had worked with Crowley a few times, but Dean was never happy about it when they did. “He has a box that is similar in magic to the cage. I can open a door from the cage into that box to ensure that Lucifer is the only one that we allow through. I thought taking the extra precautions to prevent Michael from escaping would help to ease your mind about this, it helps to ease mine. I don’t want him getting out and I know Lucifer wouldn’t want him getting out. This was my solution, to make sure everyone was safe.” The phone rang and looking at the display told him that it was Crowley calling him back, it was ready to go, now if only Dean would say his opinion on it they could get this show on the road. “Hey Crowley. Yeah, okay give me just a minute.” Sam looked at his brother trying to get his answer, and Dean looked to Cas. Talking to Sam, but never taking his eyes off of Cas, Dean finally replied. “Fine baby bro, let’s go get your angel.” Sam’s smile was huge returning to his phone call with the king of hell. “Yeah we’re ready whenever you can…” Sam’s response was cut off by Crowley showing up in the room. “What is the point of the warding if you can still just pop in whenever you want?” Dean said without any real heat and stepped over to Cas. “Look squirrel I know that you like your privacy, but moose here invited me, downright begged me so let’s try to keep the sniping down for the moment huh?”

The next thing Dean knew they were all four standing outside of a metal cage just outside of Crowley’s compound in hell. “So what’s special about this box?” Dean asked while trying to take a look at it. “It’s only warded to high heaven, or well against high heaven would probably be a better way to put it. The point is that Lucifer is the only angel that can be in the box, everyone else goes poof. Got it darling?” Sam started the incantation that would call Lucifer from the cage to the, well slightly smaller cage. Everyone was quietly watching until Sam cut his palm for the last ingredient, then Dean spoke up. “Why do you need blood Sammy? I thought it was just like a summoning ritual.” “Summoning an archangel is different, it needed blood from the angel’s vessel. It ensures that the archangel has someone to inhabit once drawn to wherever you are performing it.” Cas looked at Sam a bit funny, only getting a raised eyebrow in return. “He doesn’t need a vessel, he has Nick’s body, turned his own, to use. I just had to use it for the ritual. Don’t panic.” There was a flash and the box shook like something had hit it. Looking inside Sam found Lucifer, but he looked as if he had been beaten down and was only slumped on the floor in the corner of the cell.

Sam got the door open and ran into the cage and straight up to the archangel but stopped when he saw the absolute heartbreak on his face. “Not real, still not real, why do you keep doing this? Mikey stop please, I can’t take it anymore.” Sam knelt down next to Lucifer and he flinched away. “Lucifer, it’s me Sam…” “No, No it’s not!” Sam’s words had been cut off with Lucifer’s denial. Sam looked back to his brother who was standing with the demon and the angel looking on as his heart broke once again. He turned his attention back to the beaten down mess that Lucifer currently resembled. “It really is Luci, I found a way to get you out. They had blocked my memories because they thought that was what was causing me to lash out. I couldn’t find you, I was looking for you.”

Lucifer looked up at him then with questions and maybe a little hope in his eyes. “How do you know about that? You haven’t mentioned it before now.” Lucifer raised his hand to Sam’s face and all he could do was lean into the touch. Sam really had missed him. “It’s me Luci, I promised, I wouldn’t lie to you now.” Sam leaned in and kissed Lucifer right there in front of heaven, hell and his brother. “I love you!” Lucifer looked up into his eyes and broke down into tears. “He, he got out and pretended to be you, he wanted to punish me. When all his torture and awful remarks wouldn’t get to me, he took on your face. He made me think that you had come back, then he would turn back into himself and another piece of me died each time. I thought you were really gone, that you weren’t coming back. No, don’t look at me like that. I’m not saying that you would intentionally leave me down there, but that you couldn’t find a way to get me out. I know how dangerous it was to bring me here. He could have followed. I thought that he did, but he isn’t here now.” This last was said as he was looking around the area in which he had landed and seeing that it was only the two of them inside the cell.

“He, uh, I’m pretty sure he did try. We warded it pretty well, we wanted to make sure you were the only one to get through the door that we were creating. There was a pretty big boom when you came through, and I believe that was him meeting his end. I know you two were always at odds, but I also know he was your brother and that you wanted to fix things between you two, so I am sorry that there wasn’t another way to do this, and I’m so sorry that it caused you to lose the chance to fix things with him.” Sam looked down away from the archangel’s face. He just couldn’t take the look that Lucifer was sending his direction. Lucifer reached up to Sam’s face yet again and pulled him into a kiss. Once they had parted, to Dean’s throat being cleared, Lucifer couldn’t handle it anymore. “It’s really you. He couldn’t get the love that you show in everything that you say and do just right. It was always just a little off. It’s worth everything else just to be able to be here with you. I love you, but um, do you think we could maybe get out of this cage? I want to be able to breathe fresh air again.” Sam grinned at Lucifer and helped him to his feet. “Absolutely, let’s get out of here. I’ve had enough of hell to last me a lifetime.”


End file.
